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Nappies

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May 6, 2013 by Dadinator

This is a post about the nitty gritty of parenting. After the act of child birth itself this part of parents lives probably causes the most angst to prospective parents. I’ve lived with the reality for just over a year and a half now and I thought I might relate what I have learned from changing hundreds of nappies over my time.

Our experience relates to “MCNs” or Modern Cloth Nappies. These days cloth nappies are only slightly chunkier than their disposal cousins. They usually comprise of a nappy body and an insert or two and involve a lot of press studs. They do involve a lot of washing. We do a load of just nappies every second or third day.

So here’s what I have to say about nappies:
They are probably not going to be as bad as you think. Especially at first. Babies are tiny, they don’t excrete that much in general. Occasionally they do, but you’ll live. They don’t fill a nappy with poo every day in the early days, The Lad went through a phase where it would only happen every second or third day. They do pee a lot though…

Overall you spend up to 20 minutes of your day changing nappies. It has taken me longer than that to write this post. For us that included emptying/spraying them with water before putting them in a pail for the next wash. If you become a nappy ninja you can probably get this down to 10/15 minutes.

You will get poo on you at some point. It washes off. The Lad once managed to projectile poo at me part way through a nappy change. He has also peed on me, although only 3 times ever. I have survived. You will too.

Breast milk poo barely smells at all. Can’t speak for formula fed babies, but The Lad’s early nappies were not stink bombs. They weren’t pleasant, but my own poo smells much worse.

When the little one transitions to solids it pongs. You also can tell by sight exactly which meal they are passing because of the volume of undigested stuff in there, corn kernels and grapes especially.

You will talk to your partner about your child’s bowel movements. At least three times a day. “Has he crapped today?” “Nuh.” “S***t.” This is your life now.

So that’s my thoughts on the subject. It becomes second nature so quickly that before long you won’t even think about it. Just make sure you pull your weight, otherwise you’re being a bit of a tool.

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